Chester Bennington of Linkin Park just passed away. It was reported that he killed himself. He was suffering from extreme depression exacerbated by his surviving sexual abuse as a child, and later by alcohol and drugs.
I just wanted to record this thoughts of mine for posterity.
Listening to Linkin Park's rendition of "One more light" live in Jimmy Kimmel's Show, in memory of his friend Chris Cornell of Audioslave fame, who himself committed suicide six or seven weeks earlier, brought back memories in myself.
I try no to dwell in the past anymore. I think that I'm beyond that, thanks to what I learned while attending a 12-step program.
Nevertheless, watching Chester emotional rendition of his song, you can tell that his pain is very much raw and visible.
The darkness of the mind that takes over when memories of past abuse can be revived by witnessing other people's similar experiences.
The mind gets hijacked and you are no longer in full control of your acts and thoughts; a dangerous time, that if you don't come out of it quick it can spell disaster. And you hit bottom. Again.
Change gears. I pray for my boys, my wife and especially my baby daughter, who lives a sentence she did not asked for, and much less deserve.
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Hay veces en que uno siente que debe buscar una forma de desahogarse de corajes, malos pensamientos, enojos y otros despojos. Y una forma de hacerlo y sin herir directamente a nadie, es escribiendo y describiendo. Se logra un descanso o un desinfle pasivo. He aqui algunos de mis inspirados momentos.
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